Prophet loopholes

Continuing to baffle atheists and Christians alike, let’s take a closer look at some Brahmin loopholes. These are some I can think of on the top off my head, feel free to add your own:

Buddhism loopholes
– Too feel-good. Buddhism gives no space for the devil in men. Pure enlightenment will never be reached by a human, for mankind is fallible per definition.
– Too vague. A good religious code gives people daily instructions which both aid their daily live AND remind them who’s boss. Islam is very good at this, see 5x a day prayer and Ramadan. Buddhism does not give us anything except for ‘meditation is good’. Direct teachings attributed to Gautama Buddha are simply not concrete enough.

Although I like a lot of Buddhist beliefs, ultimately Buddhism ends up being a useful idiot for Kastriyas and an escape mechanism for middle-aged spinster women. Neither will die for their Buddhist beliefs.

Islam loopholes
– Made for a world in which all prisoner dilemmas outcomes are defect-defect. In this sense Mohammed serves as the perfect antithesis of Jesus, whose altruistic beliefs made Christians cooperate-cooperate on an unprecedented scale. Even though Islam is now able to abuse this altruism for its own good, Mohammed’s basic philosophy will prevent Islam from ever being a stable functional religion. Once it has succesfully waged war on the world, it will wage war on itself. Islam is much like a malignant tumor in this way.

Christian loopholes
– As I identify with Christianity the most it is the hardest to come up with Jesus loopholes. Overall I think gays are dealt with, and honestly I think the old testament deals with women pretty well also. Blacks I am not so sure. But perhaps the most pressing loophole is the fact that Jesus never tells us to ‘man the fuck up’. Yes Christians are friendly, yes they try their utmost to do good in the world, but they are overwhelmingly beta do-gooders who hide behind what is left of their community, inwardly feel superior towards atheists yet outwardly are shut up in every serious discussion.

General loopholes
– No prophet has spoken out against tobacco smoking. Tobacco only entered Europe in the 16th century so no blame for them. Generally though I am fairly sure that they would disapprove of the habit (or one would hope so). An additional commandment would perhaps be in place: “commandment 11: thou shalt not smoke tobacco.”
– So whats the deal with abortion, porn & contraception? Are these grave sins? Minor sins? In the category of murder or of masturbation?

4 thoughts on “Prophet loopholes

  1. Jesus does say, “Be ye therefore perfect (complete), even as your father in Heaven is perfect.” That’s pretty much “Man the fuck up” for reasonable values of fuck.

    Tobacco is a gift from God and I would never trust a prophet who wished to ban it. Nor alcohol, which is why Islam is retarded.

    Abortion, porn, contraception, murder, AND masturbation are all grave sins.

    1. I’m (re)reading the bible right now so I defer to your judgment. I will say that in my experience ‘turn the other cheek’ is a lot more popular among Christians than ‘be as your father in heaven’.

      Alcohol I understand, but from my viewpoint tobacco is a mass-murderer. Why isn’t tobacco sinful? Am I missing some kind of eugenic argument or is Nick B Steves a 2-packs-a-day smoker?

      1. Nicotine is clearly a cognitive enhancer and benificent. A wise king would put it in the water supply. I believe cigarettes to be primarily responsible for landing Americans on the moon. OK. Cigarettes and crew-cuts. It’s no accident humans haven’t been out of LEO since 1973. We started eating “low-fat” and started to quit smoking in droves. 1973 may very mark the high tide of Western Civilization.

        Whether the delivery system of smoking it is safe is not nearly as closed a question as the Mainstream Narrative™ would have us believe. Politicized science is politics, not science. Gwern, Mitchell Laurel, and (IIRC) Bruce Charlton have written at length on tobacco and nicotine from a skeptical and scholarly perspective. I mostly dip snus to get my nicotine, but I smoke the occasional cigarette, cigar, or pipe.

        “Mass-murderer” is not a type of thing tobacco could be.

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